Life is hard. But here’s the truth: you get to choose your hard. Being out of shape is hard. Working out every day is hard. Being broke is hard. Living on a budget is hard. Every version of life comes with a challenge that is hard. The question is: Which hard are you willing to choose?
Working in personal development, I’ve seen countless young people paralyzed by indecision, waiting for the “easy” path to reveal itself. But the reality is that ease rarely leads to growth. The path to anything worthwhile is paved with discipline. Let’s talk about how choosing your hard intentionally can reshape your life.
What Does “Choose Your Hard” Really Mean?
The Philosophy in a Sentence
“Choose your hard” is a mindset. It acknowledges that all choices have consequences and that avoiding discomfort doesn’t make life easier—it just trades one type of pain for another. Doing nothing is also a decision that has consequences.
You can choose the discomfort of exercising, or the discomfort of low energy and declining health. You can choose the discipline of budgeting or the stress of living paycheck to paycheck. Either way, there’s a price to pay. The great news? You get to decide.
Why Most People Avoid This Choice
We live in a culture that celebrates ease, speed, and shortcuts. Social media glorifies the finish line but skips over the hard work. That creates a dangerous illusion that if something feels hard, it must be wrong. Or this is not what you are meant to do.
The truth is, the path of discipline may be hard upfront, but it leads to freedom eventually. Nothing worthwhile is done easily or comes without any obstacles.
The Role of Discipline in the 4 Major Areas of Life
1. Fitness: Sore Muscles or Low Energy
In college, I remember wanting to get in shape. I bought supplements, watched workout videos, and followed fitness influencers. But I didn’t commit to the process. I skipped workouts because I was “tired” or “busy.” Paid the membership but rarely went.
It wasn’t until I realized that being unhealthy was just as exhausting that I started showing up consistently. I learned that discipline in fitness gave me more energy, not less. Both paths were hard, but only one made me stronger.
2. Finances: Budgeting vs. Broke Stress
Managing money isn’t fun at first. Saying no to eating out, tracking expenses, and living on less is tough. But not as tough as waking up in debt, dodging calls from credit collectors, or missing opportunities because you’re broke. Or watching others accomplish their financial goals while you are waiting for the next paycheck to come in.
Choose your hard in money: sacrifice now or stress later. Instant gratification now or building wealth.
3. Relationships: Vulnerability vs. Distance
Honest conversations require courage. Setting boundaries takes effort. But sweeping problems under the rug eventually leads to resentment, broken trust, or emotional distance.
Discipline in relationships means showing up with honesty and empathy—even when it’s uncomfortable.
4. Career: Showing Up vs. Staying Stuck
Every job has challenges. Learning new skills, accepting feedback, and pushing past fear of failure can be tough. But so is staying in a role where you’re bored, underpaid, or overlooked. Being uncomfortable is hard, but it is temporary.
Discipline at work isn’t glamorous. But it builds the habits that put you on a path toward leadership and growth.
How to Train Yourself to Choose Your Hard
1. Start with Small, Daily Wins
Discipline is like a muscle. You don’t lift 200 lbs on day one. You start small and build from there. Commit to making your bed. Take cold showers. Take a small walk. Do the hard thing first in your day.
I began with 5 a.m. wake-ups—not because I had to, but because I needed to prove to myself that I could follow through. That one shift changed how I approached everything else. This built evidence towards my self-confidence.
2. Make Your Environment Work for You
Your surroundings impact your discipline. If your phone is full of distractions, turn off notifications or delete apps. If your fridge is stocked with junk, you’re not choosing your hard—you’re choosing the easy and painful road.
Set yourself up to win. Remove all the temptations to begin with.
3. Focus on the Long Game
We often choose what’s easy now because we forget what it will cost us later. Visualize the long-term impact. If I skip the gym today, how will I feel in six months? If I waste money this weekend, what opportunity will I miss next year?
Discipline becomes easier when you link today’s actions to tomorrow’s rewards.
Real-Life Examples of Choosing Your Hard
Hard Conversations
I once had to let go of a business partner who wasn’t pulling their weight. The conversation was uncomfortable, but avoiding it had me working harder, and their example was showing the rest of the team that it is okay to slack off when you are in leadership. That day, I learned that leadership means choosing the hard talk now to prevent bigger pain later.
Fitness Commitment
I have a friend who made the commitment to lose weight. She made one rule: no matter what, she would move for 10 minutes a day or exercise. Also, only eat things that are less in calories and avoid sweets to start. She chose her hard. Months later, she was lifting heavy weights, lost over 100 pounds, and is feeling more confident than ever. No crazy diets or secret supplements, simply focusing on effort every day, and she made progress.
Why Discipline Isn’t About Being Perfect
Choosing your hard work doesn’t mean becoming a robot. Life happens. You’ll slip up. The key is to recommit. Choosing to get back on track regardless of how many times you slip.
Discipline isn’t about never failing—it’s about always coming back.
Final Thoughts: What Hard Will You Choose Today?
You can’t escape struggle, but you can choose its direction. You can let life hit you by default, or you can lean into the challenge that grows you.
- Skip the workout, or become stronger?
- Spend recklessly, or build wealth?
- Numb out, or face the truth?
Choose your hard. Every decision today writes your future.
So what’s your hard for today? Start small. Start now. But whatever you do, just start.
References:
- Willink, Jocko. Discipline Equals Freedom: Field Manual. Macmillan, 2017.
- Clear, James. Atomic Habits. Avery, 2018.
- Duhigg, Charles. The Power of Habit. Random House, 2012.
